(in)spired to Encourage

 This week I helped my daughter say her first big goodbye to a good friend who'd become more like a sister than anything.  Her family lived at the end of our street, and they moved yesterday.  Her friend's mom has become a good friend of mine, and over the course of the girls' friendship, she's welcomed my whole family into her home for dinners and parties and impromptu back yard gatherings. Our husbands have become friends. She has shown up in my driveway at 7:30 in the morning every school morning for months to take my oldest to school, so my toddler can sleep in. Friends like this don't come along every day.  She knows how to encourage.

I've been given the opportunity to review a product for Dayspring, and I'm so excited to know their theme during the month of June is encouragement.  As a woman, my sister-friends who fill up all the little spaces in my heart with their encouragement and laughter are a gift to me every day.  I'm really looking forward to sharing my Sassy & Sophisticated cards.  Some of the words make me laugh out loud while some are so tender.

My friends are amazing.  They are real.  They let me into their lives, and I know I can let them into mine - into my three-kids-tearing-around the house evenings, my yes-it's-almost-lunch-and-I'm-still-in-my-jammies door answering mornings, my I'll-step-out-of-the-minivan-so-I-can-hear-you-over-the-Veggie Tales DVD-and-kids-talking chats on the cell phone mid-afternoon.  The real places.  The places where our lives intersect.  The shopping trips with toddlers in tow, wondering what Stacy and Clinton would say about the "trousers." The whispered prayer requests from broken hearts letting go of adoption dreams again and again.  The steady encouragement to keep praying about whatever it is in life we're discussing.  The Word shared over coffee and the noise of preschoolers tearing the house apart, but we don't care because we love our mama-time.  The laughing till we think we're going to pee our pants.  It's all that real stuff. It's the core of friendship, and it's like a breath for our souls as women.

So this month, I'm going to be intentional about showing some friends my appreciation for them.  Thank you, Dayspring, for all the many ways you give us ways to celebrate our friendships and our faith!

"A sweet friendship refreshes the soul." Proverbs 27:9

(The opinions expressed are my own, and I have not received payment for the product review.)

Measuring My Life with God's Ruler

Converting measurements is not my thing.  I'm a word girl, not a numbers girl.  I measure in inches, and in Ukraine, measurements are in centimeters.  So, when I'm shopping for my heart-son, I always get a kick out of having to Google the conversion of measurements, so I get the sizes right.  I mean, I can't even think in centimeters!

It's like this in my relationship with the Lord, too.  He measures things differently than I do.  He measures time, progress, prosperity and success by standards that are not natural to me.  And He is faithful to teach me how to convert my measuring tape so I see my life more like He does.

When I think things aren't happening quickly enough, I am reminded "For a thousand years in your sight are like a day that has just gone by." (Psalm 90:4)

When I'm not sure things are turning out as they should, He whispers, "For my thoughts are not your thhoughts, neither are your ways my ways... As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts." (Isaiah 55:8,9)

When I've sought out abundance in terms of owning nice things, Jesus says, "Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal.  But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven...For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." (Matthew 6:19)


When I've seen success at times as something people achieve through financial security or things I can see, I'm corrected by the words of my Lord, spoken to a man who had attained every measure of success as society would define it.  "Now a man came up to Jesus and asked, 'Teacher, what good thing must I do to get eternal life?'...Jesus answered, "If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven.  Then come, follow me.'  When the young man heard this, he went away sad, because he had great wealth." (Matthew 19:16, 20-21)  Jesus himself is clear that being willing to let go of our "stuff" is far more a measure of success in his eyes than being able to aquire it.

God's Word indeed pierces right through to the division of the bone and marrow (Hebrews 4:12)!  Every word of God shoots Truth and conviction straight into my spirit, and I cannot hear this Truth and remain unchanged.  I cannot spend time with a Savior who abandoned the splendor of heaven to suffer consequences of sin I earned and walk away with anything but a very clear understanding that I cannot be the one who decides how things are done or what is valuable.  I cannot measure my life by comforts or possessions or feeling a certain way.  I can only hold up as my standard a life lived in emptying out of love undeserved and yet freely given.

I'm not sure I'm ever going to become really good at figuring out sneaker sizes using centimeters, although my boy is worth every moment I'll spend trying to figure that one out!  And as I work on my centimeters-to-inches conversion for things like shoe shopping, the Lord is very faithfully about the task of changing the way my heart measures.

The Friendship Goal

My friends are amazing.  Whenever I spend time with the wonderful women in my life, I come away refreshed and encouraged.  My sometimes emptying cup is filled back up with gratitude and grace.  The parts of me that are wearing thin are made stronger.  I am connected, and my heart is full.

Time with friends is a priority to me.  It didn't used to be.  Friend time was a luxury.  It was something for after the house was perfectly clean (which it never is) and the laundry was all put away (which it sometimes is, but mostly isn't).  And because my life is real (read: not perfect!), there is always something to do, and that was causing me to miss out on the best parts of living some days.

The pressure I put on myself as a woman left me feeling like I was coming up short all the way around.  A few months ago, I received a copy of The Me Project: 21 Days to Living the Life You've Always Wanted, and one of the things I did was make a list of 50 goals.  One of them was having more time with friends.  Now that I call it a "goal" instead of a "reward" (for achieving domestic perfection...which I have yet to do), I see my friend time as it truly is: valuable and to be treasured.

If I wait to enjoy my life's precious friendships until all the other stuff is done, I will often miss out.  So I plan my fun things first now.  I write playdates into my calendar in ink and leave the other things for the pencil.  And the coolest thing has happened!  The "work" I need to do gets done faster and more joyfully!

God has made us as women to really thrive within relationships.  We need to connect.  To share.  To tell.  To listen.  God has equipped us to build each other up in our spirits in very unique and beautiful ways, and I believe the gift of friendship is something that God Himself gives us to enjoy fully.  My friends encourage me with God's Word, with their laughter and with their understanding.  They bless my parenting, my marriage, my homemaking and my heart.