"to give you HOPE and a future...."

This is how it all starts for me.  I'm watching this clip, shared by a friend on Facebook, and I am ashamed at what I do not know.  Every misconception that exists about HIV, I am guilty of assuming true.  And it's humbling, this heart for the orphan that has missed out entirely on such a large group of orphans to love, simply out of ignorance.  But this family hits my heart at its center, and the truth that requires bravery and releases hope is powerful.

Over a course of months, I read lots about Project HOPEFUL, and I often sit and wipe tears from my face as I scan the faces of children who need a mom and dad... children who need to know the Father who is their Defender and the One who hears their cry.  The Father who has promised to them, "'I know the plans I have for you,' says the LORD, 'plans for good and not for evil, to give you hope and a future.'" Jeremiah 29:11. I think of my Savior, his heart for "the least of these," and it's hard for me to sit in my house in America with my healthy children and my kitchen filled with food and the goodnight stories read in the rocking chair and not wonder, "who could this world possibly consider as less than the orphan living with HIV?"  And there are so many we call "least."  

The list of who we consider to be least grows.  It includes these little ones living with HIV, who we don't stop to consider, because we are afraid and don't know the hope that exists.  And it includes the foster children in our country whose hearts are wounded.  It includes little babies in America born with skin too dark for some waiting parents to bring them home.  It includes children who have nothing left on this earth but the brothers and sisters they have come to depend on for every sense of safety, but they are too many in number, so we break them up so it is easier on us.  And it includes boys like my Sasha, young men with promise and humor and dreams, who age-out of care and yet still are at ages where care and support and structure is needed.  

I am thankful for a Lord who shows us how to love "the least of these," and who reminds us that how we treat them is, in fact, how we are treating him.  He says, "And whoever welcomes a little child in my name welcomes me." Matthew 18:5. 

After learning a lot about Project HOPEFUL and having spent the past year and a half praying about where exactly the Lord would use me to serve in orphan care, I'm very excited to now be the Maine Associate for Project HOPEFUL.  This week I'll be learning more in a training about the variety of ways I'll be able to serve families in our own state, and I have been blessed with a very unexpected and absolutely amazing opportunity to link our trip to Ukraine to the ministry of Project HOPEFUL!

Friday morning, I enjoy a long and wonderful phone call to Traci Heim, who is Project HOPEFUL's Ukraine contact and the FIG Director (Family In the Gap Program, which helps in a variety of ways to link families here with kids in other countries who need support and love and prayer and family).  As we chase busy toddlers thoughout our homes (I automatically feel a friend-connection with anyone who understands that it's ok for me to give my 2-year old several popsicles in a row in order to manage a full phone call...), we have a two-hour conversation about Ukraine and the kids there who we love so much. This is a great news clip about her family:

Our mission in Ukraine has at its center a boy who is our son according to our hearts.  You all know our Sasha.  He is part of our family, and his photos are on our wall in our family gallery, all around my computer desk.  Our kids consider him family, and I have grieved his absense from our home tremendously over the past year, although I know God's story is not finished.  So we are thrilled to see him in only a few weeks!

As I talk to Traci, she shares a need she sees.  She tells me that Project HOPEFUL seeks to help older children and sibling groups as well as children living with HIV. We both know that in Ukraine, orphans age-out of orphanages at 16, and most often they are left on their own.  She has a vision that Project HOPEFUL can come alongside organizations who would care for these kids, offering support and linking families in the States with teens who need to know the love of family and of Christ and to be safe.  I tell her about Sunshine, about Sasha having someone to go to his trade school parent nights and about his letters sharing that he is learning to manage his time and money, and I tell her that I am so thankful he is safe and loved and provided for as he transitions to aduldhoood.

We are now adding a new element to our trip, as we connect our mission with that of Project HOPEFUL. Specifically, we are exploring the "how's" of linking up support to kids in Ukraine who need to be safe and loved and guided through learning a trade and being ready to transition to adulthood safely and successfully.  I watch as God is weaving together a relationship between our countries based on loving the orphan, and I see that even in what I thought was a closed door, God's faithfulness is opening a door of opportunity to serve Him alongside a team of people scattered across different countries but joined by His heart for "the least of these" and faith in the One who gives "hope and a future."

We've added a Donate button at the top right of our blog page, which will allow you to donate specifically to this mission in a tax deductible way through Project HOPEFUL, should you be led to do so.

{I'd like to say thank you to Project HOPEFUL for being used to share and expand the vision we have of orphan care in Ukraine!  It's been a desire of my heart to see more kids have the blessings of family and safety that Sasha has received, and I'm honored to be part of a team of people seeking to come alongside those in orphan care ministry overseas.}

{I'd like to also say thank you to Kathi Lipp for writing The Me Project: 21 Days to Living the Life You've Always Wanted and for your friendship - your words have been an encouragement to me to make steps in the direction of the dreams God has given me.}

Of the "yes" and the greatest bookstore ever

"Yes."  That's where it all starts.  At the yes.  And faith doesn't swell up in the unknowing, before-hand moments.  It is the answer we give without knowing how or when or sometimes even exactly what. But we always know why...  Because He has asked this of us.

A "yes" in the midst of not enough and no clue how and not at all qualified is the offering.  It's the giving up dependence on ourselves.  Giving up the comfort zone.  The cost of obedience to a God who has all the resources of the universe at His disposal is the willingness to let go of that small bit of what we presume is under our control.  Although it never really has been.  Not really.

And we embrace the unknown future with a sense of eagerness and wonder, knowing the story we are living has an Author whose plans for us are good.  We know that any story He writes for us is one worth living.  And worth living with abandon.

"Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see."  Hebrews 11:1

The way I write a story is to map it out... to know the way the pieces fall into place before it's all been written down and fleshed out.  But that's not the way to live a good story.

The real secret is in the yes.  The yes, no matter what.  The yes, period.  When God asks us to do something too big for us, too expensive for us, to hard for us, it is because that is when we finally get out of the way and trust in Him alone.  He orchestrates the details.  He puts people in our lives to become part of the story.  And it all starts with saying yes.  It's a leaping without needing to look, trusting that what springs up from obedience to the Lord will be a beautiful harvest.

"And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him."  Hebrews 11:6

Over and over, I am so blessed by the help we are receiving from people who are eager to help us get to Ukraine this summer.  I struggled at first with the asking for help.  It's not what I'm comfortable doing.  And that's just pride.  It's not good, and it's something God's stripping away, layer by layer.  It's been so incredible to ask for help and to see people catch the vision for helping these kids we've come to love.  And in sharing, more people have come to love these kids as well.

Today, I was at Borders (the Bangor store is THE best!) having my favorite latte, and I was so encouraged and excited to hear that they're collecting bags of flavored coffee for us to take to the caregivers in Ukraine!  What a treat for them!  This outreach has become something bigger than just ours alone.  It's something our community and friends and family are joining with us in making possible, and all the fruit that is a result of the time we spend there belongs to all of you as well.

This Man of Mine

What he is as father, this is more than a gift to them.  It is also a gift to me.  His daily rising up to leave early for a day spent providing.  For us.

The quiet strength of his character.  Unchanging. Unfailing.  A display of manhood to our little man.  An example of how to love a woman to our daughters. His steadiness.  His laughter.  The safety we feel because of his presence.

Every day, laying down so much that could be for him.  It is for us.  And it is for Him.

This man I love, a father of three with a heart to call son a fatherless boy halfway around the world.  And a heart strong enough to carry the dreams and feelings of a woman.  And wise enough to lead us in God's will.  This man is everything a man could ever be.  And I sit in awe of him so many days.

Hours working.
Planting.
Fixing.
Making.
Providing.
Teaching.
Protecting.
And all of these things, seeds planted into the soil of lives growing up under his care...

Her Father's Daughter

"Only Daddy," she says to me, as I lean over the side of the crib, to tuck her in.  "Only Daddy.  He special."

This baby was her Daddy's girl before she was even born, and I remember the words he spoke in the sonographer's room, as we watched the squirming baby on the screen.  When we were told this baby was a daughter, my husband - all man... strong, rational, logical, unwavering - said, "I'm ruined."

And so it has been.

These two loves of mine have standing Starbucks dates on weekend mornings.  They shoe shop at L.L. Bean. She has even gotten him to sing the theme song to Veggie Tales (and he is a self-proclaimed "non-singer," you must know).   I laugh as I ask her for a kiss, and she often says, "Only Daddy."


Sitting back, I watch them.  I see the tenderness they have with one another. And I see the places this love will be carried in the years to come.  These things I know because I am a Daddy's girl myself.

One day, she will have her own family, and if she lives very far from her dad at all, she will have to look out the window for a few minutes as her husband drives them away.  So the tears don't spill over her lashes.  So she can keep looking at her father until she can no longer see him standing there, waving goodbye.

(in)spired to Encourage

 This week I helped my daughter say her first big goodbye to a good friend who'd become more like a sister than anything.  Her family lived at the end of our street, and they moved yesterday.  Her friend's mom has become a good friend of mine, and over the course of the girls' friendship, she's welcomed my whole family into her home for dinners and parties and impromptu back yard gatherings. Our husbands have become friends. She has shown up in my driveway at 7:30 in the morning every school morning for months to take my oldest to school, so my toddler can sleep in. Friends like this don't come along every day.  She knows how to encourage.

I've been given the opportunity to review a product for Dayspring, and I'm so excited to know their theme during the month of June is encouragement.  As a woman, my sister-friends who fill up all the little spaces in my heart with their encouragement and laughter are a gift to me every day.  I'm really looking forward to sharing my Sassy & Sophisticated cards.  Some of the words make me laugh out loud while some are so tender.

My friends are amazing.  They are real.  They let me into their lives, and I know I can let them into mine - into my three-kids-tearing-around the house evenings, my yes-it's-almost-lunch-and-I'm-still-in-my-jammies door answering mornings, my I'll-step-out-of-the-minivan-so-I-can-hear-you-over-the-Veggie Tales DVD-and-kids-talking chats on the cell phone mid-afternoon.  The real places.  The places where our lives intersect.  The shopping trips with toddlers in tow, wondering what Stacy and Clinton would say about the "trousers." The whispered prayer requests from broken hearts letting go of adoption dreams again and again.  The steady encouragement to keep praying about whatever it is in life we're discussing.  The Word shared over coffee and the noise of preschoolers tearing the house apart, but we don't care because we love our mama-time.  The laughing till we think we're going to pee our pants.  It's all that real stuff. It's the core of friendship, and it's like a breath for our souls as women.

So this month, I'm going to be intentional about showing some friends my appreciation for them.  Thank you, Dayspring, for all the many ways you give us ways to celebrate our friendships and our faith!

"A sweet friendship refreshes the soul." Proverbs 27:9

(The opinions expressed are my own, and I have not received payment for the product review.)

Summer Days

How quickly the days of warmth and sand and carefree, crazy summer fly past.  What treasures we have in the captured moments.  The images frozen mid-air in our memories or in a photograph.  Some pictures reveal the same location and the same people, year after year, but oh, how we are changing.  The days of small hands in mine are replaced with my stumbling over shoes way larger than my own, worn by kids whose little bodies are turning into grownups before my eyes, and whose hearts are even more beautiful than their sweet faces.  The only way I'm learning how to keep the moments from slipping away from me too quickly is to try to be there, present, in the moment.  Sometimes I do well at this, and sometimes I realize I have so much to learn about stillness and focus.  I don't want to miss a single grace-filled moment.

Looking back at some memories from last summer, I'm eagerly anticipating what will become the memories of this one just unfolding...  What are your best summer memories?  What are you hoping to do this summer?

Let's thank God in advance for the good plans He has in store for each of our families this season.  Some days are hard.  Some days are sun-filled.  The Lord is with us in each and by His grace alone, we will always have cause for joy.

Praying for you, my friends, to have a blessed summer! I'm glad to have you all in my life, to share the wild ride that is chasing after a radical faith in Christ.

Watering Cans and Living Water

 These days, we are doing so much growing.  Watching the beauty of seeds planted in past seasons developing into incredible new life.  Days of sun beating down and wandering through the garden with my two-year old, watering cans in hand, admiring what our God does in our very own yard.  We see the daily transformation of strawberry plants as they flower and now as the berries are growing plump.  We gently lift small new plants from their little containers and carefully tuck them into the fresh potting soil in our old, rusty pots.  Her litte chubby hands leave a trail of soil along the driveway as she grabs fistfuls to pat around the roots.  

 I watch her trot through the yard, carrying her purple watering can, so proud of how she is learning to care for the life that is entrusted to her.  "This guy need a drink?" she asks me each time, before dousing the plants and the pavement and the porch steps with water.  She wants to water everything. 


Something about the way she is joyful in the working makes me hope that when my Father looks at me as I'm tending the lives in my care, He sees the same passion.

And like my little girl with her watering can filled to overflowing, so is my life, my spirit.  I hope that I am someone who "waters" like my toddler does... taking the abundance and the very life-giving Truth that has been given to me and pouring it out, recklessly, enthusiastically, continually.

There is so much of God's grace and goodness springing up in our lives.  Intricate, beautiful, exciting opportunities to make much of God and to glorify Him in our lives are continually unfolding.  Our lives are being poured into by others and by the Lord even as we are endeavoring to be ones who are continually being emptied of ourselves so that we can be filled fully with Him.

"But we have these treasures in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us." 2 Corinthians 4:7


"Jesus answered, 'Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst.  Indeed, the water I give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life.'" John 4:13 & 14